Today is the official holiday designated to celebrate, I guess, the birthdays of all US presidents. It used to be that on February 12th we celebrated Lincoln’s birthday and February 22nd we celebrated Washington’s. Now it seems we lump all the presidents together on one day in February. We make it a Monday so we can have a long weekend. Makes sense, but perhaps someone can clarify that, please?
Our Story of the Week is an example of a man who would be president. What’s unusual is that he wants to clear the air to begin with, by confessing to all the bad things he has done and his most despicable character traits.. The man is Mark Twain, one of America’s most beloved humorists.
Right off the bat he tells us he is a heartless brute. He once took a shotgun and made his grandfather climb a tree and stay there all night. He confesses to being inhuman, but the man did snore.
He also ran away at the battle of Gettysburg. His friends tried to smooth it over by saying he was just imitating George Washington who ran into the woods at the battle of Valley Forge. Washington went there to say his prayers and so did Twain. But Twain admits he was scared and didn’t want to die.
There were a few other bad things he confessed to in this short four page story, but I’ll save them for you to read.
Finally, in the end he sums up his offerings in this manner:
“I recommend myself as a safe man – a man who starts from the basis of total depravity and proposes to be fiendish to the last.”
I can’t help but compare this style of campaigning to our current style. Now it seems our candidates pose as the perfect person and let others point out their faults. I wonder what modern marketing and spin-doctors think of Mark Twain’s message.
You can read this story online at Library of America’s Story of the Week.
Short Story Monday is sponsored by John at Book Mind Set.
I’ve been subscribing to this site because of your posts and JoAnn’s. I need to make sure I read the stories!! I will have to go back and read this one!
I have to get over to this site, there seem to be too many stories to pass up. This sounds like a good one.
This is exactly why I love Mark Twain above all other American writers. If only today’s real candidates were so candid!
Sounds funny (of course, it’s Mark Twain!)!
We could use some of that honesty! And humor. I just learned (by means of Monday’s NYT crossword puzzle and then a quick google search) that Presidents’ Day is now meant to celebrate all presidents. Until then I too thought it was just to combine Washington’s and Lincoln’s. (Sadly, what apparently it really is for most people is a long weekend to shop the sales!)
I would love it if Twain could come back and moderate one of the Republican debates. LOL!
Oh, politicians. They are such dolts, aren’t they? People tend to respect honesty and it’s an insult to our intelligence to give us the bs that they do. Hm. That wasn’t what I started out to say at all!
Just started reading a book of the best letters of the 1900′s and I’ve already read a few by Mark Twain and they’ve been my favorites early on. I think I’m going to start sharing some of them on the blog.